It's over this year, but never really over.

It's hard for me to believe that Christmas is already over! The anticipation, the purchasing, the wrapping, and the espionage are over. The gifts have been opened and most of the food eaten. While it's sad that the holiday of Christmas is over, but (i know it's corny) the spirit of Christmas should continue. I don't necessarily mean the generosity and kindness, thought those things are not bad at all, I mean the attitude of worship towards Christ that Christians should have during the holidays. Church attendance goes up around Christmas time, and we should most definitely take the opportunity to share the Gospel with these people. What I mean is that we should live remembering the birth of Christ every single day. The birth of Christ is the foundation of the Gospel, not just the beginning of an uplifting story to tell at Christmas time. We should live everyday proclaiming the birth of Christ! (And I'm sure if you want to give out gifts, no one will oppose you.) So preach the Gospel, starting with the virgin birth, and remember Christ's sacrifice began with His departure from heaven.

The Strength of Love

Set me as a seal upon your heart, as a seal upon your arm, for love is strong as death, jealousy is fierce as the grave. Its flashes are flashes of fire, the very  flame of the LORD. Many waters cannot quench love,  neither can floods drown it. ~ Song of Songs 8:6-7

Before I left school for Christmas break, my roommate and I had a great discussion about the above verse and God's love for us. We talked about how we, as girls, struggle with insecurity and feeling unloved. Feelings of unworthiness can enter our minds easily, but they're hard to get rid of. In a way, feeling unworthy isn't a bad thing. We are so unworthy of God's love and we couldn't ever do anything to deserve it, but that's where the beauty of this verse comes in. God loves me despite everything else and His love is intense. I didn't do anything to deserve this love, but God freely gives it. Why is it so hard for me to accept a free gift sometimes? I don't think I can answer that fully, but I do know this: God's love for me is stronger and deeper than any feelings of insecurity will ever be. In The Message's translation of this verse it says: "Passion laughs at the terrors of hell." Go back and read that quote again. How awesome is that? I read in the Bible of how awful hell is, but God's passion for me LAUGHS at hell. Laughs! God's not worried about anything Satan can do because his passion is all-consuming and all-powerful. He can overcome anything, so He laughs at Satan's attempts to control people with fear. God has me in His hands, I am safer there than anywhere else! So, when those feelings inevitably arise again, I'll go to this verse and remind myself of God's undying passion for me that is not dependent on anything I can do. And when I think on that, how can I help but be satisfied in Him?

It's finally done!

As hard as it is believe, I am officially done with my first semester of college! It doesn't seem possible! The semester truly flew. I have lived on my own for over three months now and I've survived. I made good grades and some really great friends. College is turning out to be such a fun experience for me, though it's not without it's share of hard work. I don't think I've ever studied as much in my entire school career as I did during my last week of school. I did not pull any all-nighters, but I definitely hit the books hard! As I leave this semester and head into the Christmas season, I look back on God's faithfulness to me in these past few months alone. He is truly a great God!

He lead me to go to NGU in the first place, He provided the money for the semester and my car. He provided me with an awesome roommate and amazing suitemates. He gave me the courage to meet new people and befriend them and blessed me with others who befriended me when I wasn't expecting it. He blessed me with a work study to help with my tuition bill and with the stamina to get all of my work done on time. He gave me clarity of mind on all of my tests and creativity for all of my papers. Without God, I am truly nothing and I would have undoubtedly have failed at every endeavor this semester. He has truly blessed me beyond what I could have asked for or desired, and for that I am truly, unbelievably thankful.

"Now to Him who is able to do immeasurably more than all we ask or imagine, according to his power that is at work within us,to Him be glory in the church and in Christ Jesus throughout all generations, for ever and ever! Amen." Ephesians 3:20-21

Patience is a virtue, unfortunately.

The title of this post was not meant to offend anyone, it was simply a confession. I lack patience. I know that most of us would not be so bold as to say that we are patient with everyone, all the time, no matter what, but we like to think of ourselves as pretty decent people who are patient enough. Most of the time, I fell that I fall below the "normal" level of patience. I hate waiting. Waiting for food, for my car to warm up, for someone to call me back, for a class to be done; all of it frustrates me. As inconvenient as it is for me, God expects it of His children. Patience is a fruit of the Spirit, love is patient, wise men are patient. The Bible is full of praise for the patient. Why do I struggle with it so much, then? I am sinful, ridiculously so. The only way for me to get more patience is for me to be put in situations that stretch my patience so I have a chance to lean on the Holy Spirit and persevere with patience. So, I do the unthinkable and pray for patience. People who say God doesn't answer prayers should pray for patience, boy does He answer! All in all, patience in a necessary virtue and God will grant it to you, but you have to grow in it. Little by little, day by day.

The People That Make My Life Fun

Tonight was open dorms on campus in celebration of Halloween on Sunday! The people in this picture are my best friends, and they are the posse who hung out in our room tonight. These four people make college a fun time for me, without a doubt. We hang out a lot and we laugh so much when we're together. I went through the first half of the semester kind of lonely, I hadn't really gotten close to anyone yet, though I was already friends with these wonderful people. After fall break, the five of us starting hanging out on a regular basis and I'm so grateful to God that I have these people in my life. They've taught me so much, and I'm so proud to call them my friends. Thanks Rae, Trenton, Tyler, and Catherine for being the best friends ever. I love you guys!!

p.s.- Thanks for coming by, Mrs. Looper!! Your kids are so adorable and I'm in love with your babywrap thing. :-) 

Where the Cool Kids Hang Out

Some people who read the title and see the picture may think I'm joking, but I'm dead serious. If I tried to count the number of times I've made a trip to Walmart since moving to NGU, the number would be well on its way to twenty, maybe thirty. The location of NGU and the lack of funds of the average college student are reason enough to go to Walmart three times a week, but other, more entertaining reasons exist. Racing shopping carts, singing as you walk, laughing about random items, and the $5 movie bin are just a few examples of the fun times that Walmart provides. Not to mention the array of cheap junk food available for purchase 24/7. Walmart is a source of fun for me while I'm at NGU, that's all there is to it.

Not Responding To Chat

Most of the world is on Facebook by now, so this post should resonate with the five people who actually read my blog. How annoying is it when you're chatting with a friend on Facebook and they, all of a sudden, go offline? I, personally, always say goodbye before I log off. When I'm talking to a good friend on chat and they stop responding, it causes me to doubt myself. I thought we were friends, so do they not like me? Did I do something wrong or offend them? It's even worse when they log out in the middle of a conversation. Either that person is a jerk and doesn't care, or their Internet is messing up. Those are the only two reasons why a person should log off from a chat with me. Moral of my random rant: Don't log off on your friends on Facebook. Just say goodbye first to save yourself a lot of headache.

My Rae of Sunshine

The misspelling of a word in the title was purposeful. This is Rae. Everyone say "Hi, Rae!". Now that we all know each other, I'll tell you a bit about this pretty girl. She's one of my suitemates. (In other words, we share a bathroom.)  She and I have been hanging out since move-in day and, after the first few weeks, began to become great friends. The oft-quoted relationship mantra "opposites attract" applies perfectly in our situation. We could not be any more different if we tried, but we get along beautifully. The greatest thing about our friendship is how comfortable we are with each other. There aren't any awkward moments or lulls in the conversation. We both have lots to say, trust me. I can't explain why I love her so much, or why we've just "clicked" the way we have other than to say that God brought us together. I'm so grateful to have a such a wonderful friend as Rae!

The Best Graduation Present!

When I graduated from high school I received many amazing and sweet gifts and cards from friends and family that I greatly appreciated. I loved all of my gifts, but one in particular stuck out as my favorite. A friend bought me a copy of the Dr. Seuss book, Oh, The Places You'll Go!. Aside from the fact that it's my favorite Dr. Seuss book, she also brought pens so that the guests at my graduation party could write on the inside and back covers. It was such an incredibly touching gift. I honestly cannot read the messages written in the book without tears. Reading the book within the context of moving to college also brings tears, sometimes I can't even finish it. I will, however, share one of my favorite sections of the book here, enjoy!

On and on you will hike.

And I know you'll hike far

and face up to your problems

whatever they are.

You'll get mixed up, of course,

as you already know.

You'll get mixed up

with many strange birds as you go.

So be sure when you step.

Step with care and great tact

and remember that Life's

a Great Balancing Act.

Just never forget to be dexterous and deft.

And never mix up your right foot with your left."

Happy Saturday!

If Life Were A Musical

If life were a musical, there would be several consequences. Some of these would be funny, but some might be annoying. Since I seem to be big fan of listing, here are some plausible consequences of living in a musical:

• Everyone would always sing the same song, the right lyrics, and hit the notes perfectly at all times.
• Everyone would know a dance to every song that the whole group knows, and they'd do it in perfect rhythm.
• Everyday situations would be turned into songs, thus making boring tasks more fun.
• All people would find soul mates, then sing together in perfect harmony.
• Everyone would dress nicely and coordinate with everyone they come into contact with.
• Conflicts would always be resolved in a dance fight. (So fun!)

Basically, life in a musical would be fun, but incredibly predictable. I guess you'll have to decide what you're willing to live with: predictability or boredom?

Some of My Favorite Verses

I'm not really sure what to blog about today, so I'll share some of my favorite Bible verses, in no particular order. Have a great weekend and, for all my NGU friends, Fall Break!!

• Repent, then, and turn to God, so that your sins may be wiped out, that times of refreshing may come from the Lord. ~ Acts 3:19
• Charm is deceptive, and beauty is fleeting; but a woman who fears the LORD is to be praised. ~ Proverbs 31:30
• For if you remain silent at this time, relief and deliverance for the Jews will arise from another place, but you and your father's family will perish. And who knows but that you have come to royal position for such a time as this? ~ Esther 4:14
• God is our refuge and strength,an ever-present help in trouble.Therefore we will not fear, though the earth give way and the mountains fall into the heart of the sea,though its waters roar and foam and the mountains quake with their surging. ~ Psalm 46:1-3
• Therefore, to one who knows the right thing to do and does not do it, to him it is sin.~ James 4:17   
•  The LORD gave and the LORD has taken away; may the name of the LORD be praised. ~Job 1:21b
  
  
  
  
  *There's really no point for the colors, just for your entertainment.
  
  
  
      

Credit Cards

My roommates and I got into an interesting discussion about credit cards this evening on our way back from dinner. They both agreed that credit cards were a fine idea, as long as the person was able to pay it off, what's the big deal? I hold the complete opposite view. (Just to clarify, this was a discussion, not an argument. None of us are angry with the others, we're all still friends.) While I can understand their view, I also think credit cards are a nightmare, both logically and financially. Let's follow the "credit card" concept to its end. Credit is essentially buying something that you don't have the money for at the moment and paying it back when the bill comes. In my short life I've never used a credit card, but if I don't have the money for something, I just don't buy it! It seems simple to me. What happens when you don't have the money for the credit card bill? You pay the minimum balance and accrue interest while you continue used the card to buy more things that you cannot afford. This cycle continues until you wake up one day thousands of dollars in credit card debt that will take years to dig out of. Maybe it's just me, but that doesn't sound like fun.( I'll get off of my soapbox now.) Credit cards in themselves are not evil, but they can be an easy avenue for wasting one of our most important God-given resources, our finances.

Why I Love Thursdays

For most people, Friday is the day of choice. It's the last day of school and or work for most people, and begins the weekend. My favorite day of the week is Thursday, and I'll list some of my reasons for you:

1. It's the last day before the weekend. (Come on, we all count Friday as the weekend.)
2. I have field experience with my first graders!
3. I have ONE class, and only ONE class.
4. I don't have to work.
5. BSU!!!!!!!!!!!!
6. I get to eat three meals, which isn't an everyday occurrence with my schedule.
7. I get to hang out with my roommates at dinner and laugh until my stomach hurts.
8. I talk to my mom and sometimes my sisters on the phone.

Those are just a few of the many reasons why Thursday is a great day.

Concentrate!!

As this adorable video from Sesame Street shows, concentrating is very important to do, but is often a difficult task. It is extremely easy to become distracted by anything. It doesn't have to be something obvious like Facebook or YouTube, it can be as simple as a fly or a piece of candy that distracts me from my schoolwork. Concentration is an extremely important skill to possess in college, though, because large volumes of homework and exams demand lots of extra study time. I've found the best way for me to concentrate is to isolate myself. Whether that be wearing headphones, going to the library, or sitting on a bench, being alone helps me to be productive and to concentrate. Once I'm alone, concentration becomes much easier. Others have different techniques, but the same principle applies. In order to concentrate, eliminate distractions!

Encouragement

Moving to college can be a disheartening experience at times. College tends to show me how little I actually do know. I have some great friends on campus, but I've only lived here about 6 weeks, so no super deep bonds have formed yet. I don't normally get discouraged easily, but I was definitely there last week. I was honestly feeling very down, overwhelmed, and lonely. I got a text from Caleb, a friend of mine who does not attend North Greenville, saying this: "John 14:27 Peace be with you, My peace I give you. I do not give to you as the world gives. Do not let your hearts be troubled and do not be afraid.- I pray that you will be able to not worry about homework, college, major and minor decisions, your job and whatever else that might be stressing you out. God already has a plan set for you even though we can't see it right now. Whatever is meant to be will happen! Love you Chelsea and have an amazing day!" This encouraging message came at a perfect time, and Caleb had no idea what was going on that day. He's done several encouraging things like this since I moved. Some people are said to have the gift of encouragement, and Caleb fits perfectly in that category. Thank the Lord for friends!

Conviction

Just a note: I promise, I'm not writing on all of these serious topics to make myself seem smart. I'm just writing from my experiences and thoughts as this semester progresses.
North Greeenville is a very missions-minded school, that is obvious. This week, however, the missions ante was upped a bit. This week is global missions week here on campus and we've been having special chapels, dinners, and other events since Monday. Tonight, I attended one of the bonus chapels. Admittedly, my reason for going was selfish. I wanted an extra chapel credit in order to earn an extra chapel skip. God had other plans, however, and the service was very convicting to me. The speaker was very passionate about what he'd experienced on the mission field and challenged us from Scripture to not see if we were called, but be ready to go where God wanted us to. I felt God convicting me over my heart, or lack thereof, and my complacency of late. My heart is not as concerned as it should be for the lost. I'm content to sit back and "let God work" while I go on living my great American life. This is not what God expects of me. He expects me to be passionately concerned about every single soul that hasn't had a chance to hear the Gospel. I was humbled in bonus chapel tonight by the conviction of my own selfishness. I don't know yet where God wants me to serve, but I'm here, ready and willing.

First Essay Experience

My first official college essay has been an interesting experience. The MLA format and I have never been friends. In fact, we're not even acquaintances. Despite my and MLA's relational challenges, I managed to cope. I had a bit of writer's block early on in my writing process. (Judging by the length of some of my previous posts, it may sound impossible.) I finally decided on the descriptive essay on my favorite place as a child. I wrote about the woods behind my grandparents' house. Coming up with colorful, appropriate descriptions was more challenging than I anticipated. When the essay was finally finished, formatted, double-checked, and triple-checked I printed it out to turn in. The process for writing this essay was stressful, but it also provided me with a trip down memory lane, which I enjoyed very much.

The Beauty of Skype

 Since I've moved to North Greenville I've been homesick. Most of the time, I'm a happy, well-adjusted freshman who really does enjoy college life. Homesickness, however, is inevitable for a freshman. I've lived with the same people for eighteen years. I know my family inside and out and the routine of life together seemed as natural as breathing. College, however, separated me completely  from my family. There are obviously good and bad sides to that and I know we all must break away sometime. I did it, and I'm surviving! I do, however, get homesick from time to time. I miss seeing my family, eating my mom's food (that may be the thing I miss most), being at my home church, and driving without the aid of my GPS. On those days where I just can't stand it and a phone call isn't quite enough, I have a glorious thing called Skype!

Skype is a free, downloadable program that allows anyone with high speed internet access and a web cam to video call anyone else with the same features on their computer. (Skype allows its users to do many other things such as chat, call landlines, and much more, but I want to focus on the video calls.) Aside from the undeniable cool factor, Skype allows people who are far from each other to communicate "face to face". I can see and talk to my family, despite the fact that they're three hours away! It is amazing to see their expressions and hear their stories on my computer! If it were not for Skype, I think I'd be homesick a lot more.

Freshman Retreat

This weekend I was incredibly blessed to be a part of BSU's freshman retreat. Eight freshman [all girls!] went with the BSU counsel to a beautiful retreat center to spend Friday night and the majority of Saturday. We spent our time getting to know each other, hearing great messages, singing together, and playing crazy board games. The amazing thing about the weekend was the way the BSU leadership loved on us freshman. They were completely open. They listened, offered advice, and laughed with us. As a freshman, it's sometimes intimidating to try to make friends with upperclassmen who seem to have it all together. This weekend showed me that they're excited to hang out with freshman and make us feel welcome. That simple willingness really shows me that they "walk the walk" that they talk about every week in BSU. These people are real and I see Christ's love through them.

Walk Humbly

"If someone offered you an award for your humility, should you accept it?" My grandfather has asked me that question many times, but I can't seem to come with a satisfactory answer. If I accepted the honor, would that then prove I have pride in my humility? Is that even possible? God's final requirement in Micah 6:8 is for us, as believers, to walk humbly. Admittedly, humility is not something that comes naturally to any of us. I tend to mistake quiet shyness for humility. While that can indeed be the case, many times it's our pride that keeps us quiet. In my own life, for example, I tend to clam up and not answer questions in class if I believe there's a chance my answer won't be right. That's not humility, that's pride. I don't want to be wrong or appear foolish so I just don't talk. That is not what the Lord means by walk humbly. We're not to simply seem humble, we are to walk that way. Humility should be a natural outpouring of our love for God, but oftentimes we let our stubborn, sinful, human pride get in the way. To fully live in God's will, we must push aside our selfish pride and walk in humbleness. Humility could mean looking foolish in front of people or being told how wrong you really are. But it's those instances that strengthen our humility and allow it to become a more central part to our Christian lives.

Love Mercy

"And you, o man, what does the Lord require of you? To act justly, to love mercy, and to walk humbly before your God." Micah 6:8. My last post touched on the first of the three requirements, so this one will follow suit with the second requirement. Micah tell us that the Lord expects us to "Love Mercy" and this one, admittedly isn't much easier than the last. Sure, in theory, it seems like a cinch. Mercy seems like a pretty easy thing to get on board with. God shows mercy every second of every day. Simply breathing each day is a mercy from God. This post would never end if I listed all the mercies God provides me each day. That verse, however, isn't talking only about God's mercy. We are told to love it. Easy, right? It is not as simple as it seems. We don't always see God's mercies as a good thing. How many times have our plans fallen to pieces and we've been angry with God. Why did He let that happen? Didn't He know how long I've been planning that? We rant and rail about the unfairness of it all. What's most important in these situations is perspective and retrospect. God has the ultimate perspective and He truly knows what's going help His followers to accomplish His will. How many times have my plans failed and, at a later date, I see that God was preventing or protecting me. I then thank and praise God for His provision and mercy on me. If I'm supposed to love mercy, should I not love it all the time, even when it's not convenient for me? That's extremely convicting for me. I need to be consistently loving mercy in order to be in line with God's requirements for my life as a believer, but how often do I?

The Blue Camp Shir t~ Act Justly

These are my youth group girls from back home in Thomasville, NC. When this picture was taken, we were at Student Life camp in Daytona Beach, FL, and we all bought matching shirts. Besides the corniness of it all, these are really great shirts. It may be hard to tell in the picture, but the front says "Act Justly, Love Mercy, Walk Humbly" That comes from Micah 6:8, the focus verse for our week at camp. I'm wearing my blue Micah 6:8 shirt as I type this. Every time I wear this shirt, I'm reminded both of the great times we had on that trip, but I'm also reminded of the staggering conviction of this verse. The entirety of the verse is as follows: "And you, o man, what does the Lord require of you? To act justly, to love mercy, and to walk humbly before your God." When I really think about it, how often in my life are these three things actually accomplished? The first one seems easy. Justice is a beautiful thing and most Christians would say we're for it. We support great causes like The International Justice Mission, Love 146, and Abort 73. I'm not tearing down any of these organizations, they all do amazing things for adults, children, and the unborn worldwide who are treated unfairly and unjustly. Let's make this a little more personal, though. How much of a "fan" of justice are you when you get a speeding ticket? Sorry to be the bearer of bad news, but the speed limit's there for a reason and it's the law. Most of us would agree that lawbreakers should be punished. When it's us in the hot seat, however, we tend to make excuses for our bad behavior because, after all, we were "just" speeding! That's just it, though, Micah 6:8 tell us that the Lord requires us to act justly. It's not a suggestion. Acting justly does not only encompass the treatment of other people, it means submitting to justice ourselves as well. The requirements of faith apply to our own personal decisions as well as how we treat others. I'll tackle "love mercy" and "walk humbly" as best I can in future posts.

Blessings Abound

This is Catherine! Catherine is my roommate here at North Greenville University. I have to admit, I was extremely nervous in the weeks before I moved about meeting Catherine. So many questions and doubts ran through my mind.What would she be like? Would she like me? Would we like any of the same things? My fears, however, were unfounded because we get along beautifully! While we are different in many ways, we are unbelievably similar. For instance, we both love breakfast, Owl City, Hairspray, Dr. Pepper, Kelly Clarkson, Jane Austen, Target, and we're both PCs [sorry Mac enthusiasts]. Apart from the similarity in our preferences, Catherine's heart is what really amazes me. She wants to be a missionary in China and show Jesus to people who might not have a chance to hear about Him otherwise. She's an awesome roommate, a sweet friend, and a bit of a free spirit. I'm confident she'll make me stop studying once in a while and have fun! I'm so grateful to God for Catherine. So many times, roommates just do not get along, but that's not the case with us. I have a feeling we'll be friends for years to come.

What's Anxious Aspiration?

"Anxious Aspiration", is , obviously, the name I've chosen for my blog. Why did I choose those two words? Well, in the technical sense, they are an alliteration, which makes it easy to remember the name. Other than easy remembrance, though, I think these two words describe my attitude towards the new stage in my life. This school year (2010-2011) is my first year of college, and my first time living away from home. I'm attending North Greenville University in Tigerville, SC, three hours and fifteen minutes away from my home in Thomasville, NC. While today is only my fifth day of classes, I'm already loving life here. However, life in college, does not come without its challenges. That is the reason I named my blog "Anxious Aspiration". The anxious part of the title was chosen for an obvious reason: college is stressful and a little scary for a freshman who's never lived anywhere but home. The second half of the alliteration describes what I hope for in college and life. My dreams, plans, and goals are my "aspiration". The two terms are undeniably woven together through the college experience. Aspirations require work, and, thus, produce anxiety. Anxiety, though, can be a driving motivational push to get the necessary work done in order to achieve the aspirations. And that is why I named my blog "Anxious Aspiration", because I anxiously aspire to be and do all I can in the years ahead in school and my future life.